PG-13

Why are we going this way?

So I'm trying to write a piece for Spoken Word.. and I'm having difficulties. My main problem is my lack of confidence in what ideas are keepers and which are not. I can and do write tons of just little bits of lines down, but do they make a story? In most cases no. And this is discouraging me to indulge more into it. My basic idea is that I want the piece to be about me and my conflicting angel and devil play out. My inner dialogue written on paper and then preformed aloud. You see I have these voices in my head that can have conversations when I'm daydreaming, there aren't any concrete characters but rather the same actors playing a collage of personae. Although now that I think about it, I haven't named them with any sort of defining personal characteristics.. I just knew, if that makes any sense. I'll start noting those things and keep you posted.  I want to do it in a way where I lose my rage and kinda go crazy. I want it to be a very powerful performance. I just have to get the dialogue right, and in a way that conveys some sort of redeeming message. That is where it gets sticky. Because I want to be talking to myself, while simultaneously be talking at the audience. I want them to feel horrendous pressure in their chest, I want it to be profound. In theory it is a grand concept, but I have to write it all first and then step up to the massive plate, and give it a go. Hopefully I won't swing and amiss. As far as everything written below, pappa ain't happy. It be shit. However, the grind goes on.

You've got to be insane Taylor

This is my my command, Make a stand!

You've pushed me to this people!
I say this as true
You would do nothing to me, but do what you do

Call me out to see a crowd
When all I do is stare at the ground
Scared of those eyes that speak the truth
It is latent how you come into view

When you see eyes that never blink
So raw it will make you think
What are they thinking, are our thoughts linked

Is it just me, or (are) we all going crazy

The Fires of Hell can't even live down here boy
Because I pitched you into the waters o(f bubbly)' boil

You just fell in, and roared laughter in retort

If mama can't bitch, mama ain't happy.


Not in front of the devil woman, not in front of the devil. May it be too evil?.. Does he make me say these words to you or is it my own wickedness? Is it from my own disclosed wretchedness? Is it all from my own corrupted mind?

Life is just a motion in play . . . it is summer in the night with the full moon on the horizon, shining through it . . . is reflected the following good morning to be.

You wouldn't think that, I don't mean people.

I feel very bestial. There is crazy in here head. It feels good when you do good. Yeah, yeah, yeah, but I don't know who said it.
I don't want you to walk away from me and be all okay. I want you to miss me, and if you do come back to me someday if I don't find you first I will hold you. It will be okay then.

For Taurus', life is just a crap shoot

Somewhere over the rainbow blue birds cry, oh what a wonderful feeling "why oh why." Someday I think I'll wish upon a star and question why oh why you are so far.. come closer to me-eee.

Not now, it is too fine. Not now, is it too fine?

No smoke until it is all clear.

Don't yuck my yum.

Chronic Stupidity

The empty vastness is smothering me

Girls can't be Frank. It's a guy's name for a reason.

Your only friend, the end

Pour poor rainbows

If my heart could write songs they'd sound like these.

Joy to the world, life is just like magic

Intrinsic

Simple times in May, lovely times in June
Because I know her eyes are closed too

Frankly my dear I don't give a damn.

You play ball like a girl.

I'm done of you.

I have not come, I have not come, I have just begun. I have not come just to be another one, I have come to be someone. Thunk.

Dink Woods

Titles for my future big hits (crosses fingers).. Lion King and Shut-Up. Short list but I'll get back to you.

Take me back to where I can stand it, take me back near home. I know there but not out here, where I feel most alone. Take me back oh God of please, where I am still surely known. Take me back oh God please, for now I just don't know.

I helped him/her off.

"Pleasing to the eye." --- Did this phrase come from cyclops?

Rotation
There are these machine-like beings that turn the clocks of the written
Don't be afraid to turn a new page

I don't want mail.



Pink Floyd - Goodbye Blue Sky. Lyrics here

--- The next half page or so are some lines I found out of two YouTube videos. I left parts out, edited others. It's all real life dialogue by the way, none of it is scripted. I say this knowing you will probably just end up being confused at the end anyway.

Human Crossbow
Damnit, I can notice something. I feel something (fucking) going on. Either outside or I'm inside something.

It's Justin, I'm here with you.

Who the - ? What the - ? FUCK! Who is? Who said? Godamnit.
I don't know who the fuck you are ,but I feel that(like) I am supposed to know. I can't see anything, the other side. I can't see anything, triangular, look at him there, the other side.
I feel I am in a crossbow. My knees are bent over there.
I felt that was a far away island, and there(they're) over this ocean.
Who? Is there shit over to the island?
WTF?

It's just a kitty cat

Oh shit dude, they got to him
Fuck man, He-Man lost his panthers
Attacking my fucking village get her off
They are my people, damn right
Wait, hold on.
I hit some Salvia but damn I can't get out.
Alright, um.
Dude I'm tripping
Oh, OK none of that just happened

You are all good

Alright never mind that was- Yeah but I can't get the cave off my face though.

The cable?

No! The Cave.

Oh, do you want me to help you get it off? Will you freak out?

No, just don't, just leave the cave there because (like), It's the only thing that came with Stallone.
I got some people to remember.
It's getting hot cause I ain't seen shit for the past some years
All the King's horses? They left.

It's been about 6 minutes

Damn dude, Oh.. 6 minutes? What are you talking about?
The only thing conscious of me is my mouth
Umm, hmm, hard.
I feel like the guy you see at movies who can only use his arms.
Okay never mind my lips aren't fall.
I am slowly slipping back into reality
----

Mt. Mogul(Man out of his face)

Be more mottling minded
Bind you with the M-word.
You here for rall shall talk taxi-man, you hereby stand binded(bound) by the M-word.
You middling mindly monologuing
I bind you, I stop you, I stopped you meddling mindless. The M Master. You are going to get mingled this time. You mendly, modeling man. Get mean, get middley
Don't get me, get mastered                                   1
Don't get mean, get nasty                                     2 He said one of the three.
Don't get me, get mass(t)y                                    3
Hellow Miguel mommy
But people are middle of mind all the time. I meagle you, mind you, a little line
Most people open mind a little
Be more mottle minded
D-d-d-de-e-detest these things, come on now be reasonable be more real
I have stumbled across the meaning of mife is mad. It is the meaning of all life, M.
What am I doing here taxing my, I have to be in your life, in my middly, mottley, mind
Oh middly minded mayhem.
This is most unmettly of you.
M is the meaning of leaving.
M is the meaning of things(these), I knew it. The fucking M.
----
The Lunacy, Savage Dream
The Linking Sapient Dream
The Liquid Sensations Dream

And all these powers to be, Pisces

I stand up fearfully.

It is crazy to think that I could reciprocate this exact good feeling inside
Crying tears of amber

God give me that please, I want some more heat, you want some more leet
Talk to me, seek me, leak me
Beat, beat, beat
Let me feel that beat, make me dance it

Time is not alone if you are the one having the fun
Explore it, be it, live through me
Dance the night away I pray, I pray
May, may, may.. I say it over and over

Listen to me, beam me, continue me
Hit play, fool me, say why thee fuck not?
We feel so great anyway, so what the hey?
Just cruise, and muse the night away

They have big thumbs

This writing is what I come down to. If my ego would say nothing else, it would say that I want to write. But what if I end up no good? What would I do with myself? I'd never be satisfied fully unless I was a successful writer. This is the only thing I have going for myself that I am remotely better than most at.. but what if even then I never get anywhere? Where are my "great pieces" that make my name? Huh? Gah. I guess in time, I hope, I tender.

The finger devil sign comes out where you have the person at the heart. Despite the sign representing "evil", they express it almost in a brotherly instinctual way to get across the feeling of pure passion or to get recognition of appeasement. Twhat?

Ebony and Ivory

Playing music over the vacuum is a waste of the music
... it is for background noise man
Then it isn't really music then.

The Pisces mind their bend

Are you on a drug of some kind?
Yeah it is called life and I am loving it.

Oh what a wonderful world it is outside
When I can feel the day pass alright
Through the sleeves of banded rays from the sun
Casting over me, you, listen to a bathing child

I live in the desert, I live in the mountains, I am big, my mind is big
 
Just don't wear red is all I ask
Blue lily is just a clover

I have over-spoken

I hurt my flirt on you
-----------------------
I promise the next blog will have thicker pieces.

ThoughtFul Happy Daze

Bright Eyes - Going for the gold. Lyrics here.

I guess I can't understand your way God. How you can be so giving and taking, and still be right?

              I feel that I am experiencing something that most are not. I believe that I have some insight on about this world and to whatever lays beyond it. In short terms, there is definitely something bigger than us out there. Whether or not you believe they are omnipotence/ omniscience/ omnipresence/ or etcetera... they truly do exist; it's not just us. 

             Now to each their own, because we all know that this is a sticky conversation.. a lot of feelings and ideas come about, but the key point I want to stress is this: If an idea is logical, and provable, and/or non-disprovable... then give the idea a chance, and not rule it out. That's all I'm asking. No one can prove that this all works one way and not another; this is all speculation. Have a little imagination people, and stay open-minded. Respect each other's ideas, like you would like your own to be respected.  

              I may be a bit jumpy in this writing, because this is really all just a string-train of thoughts. Basically all I want to accomplish is that you as a person believe that there is more.. really just poking at the Atheist out there with that. How could there not be more? Gah. Oh another thing, if you have a problem, comment, question or what have you.. please by all means let us have at it. Know that I won't be able or rather don't want to nitpick too much and cover all the "what if's" or "wait now I don't get how's" or "what did you mean's". We are here for some reason, there is a higher power out there.. life happens, we die, we move on.. in some fashion; we move on to the next "stage" or "level." We were not here forever.

You are able to live on by surviving through the windows to our hearts.

            While we are here I think it is our purpose to learn, to grow, and to expand. When life gives you lemons, you are able to make lemonade. Not saying you have to search for every "silver-lining" or reason, but they do exist. I mean really, how often have you searched for a needle in a haystack? You'd kill yourself. I guess that's how magnets first became popular eh? Everyone losing their needles in their haystacks... hate it when that happens. 

See that glass half full.

 “Nobody is completely useless – if nothing else, you can always serve as a bad example.”

              Karma, does exist. At least at it can be seen always as a perfectly balanced-fashioning system. Every action, has an equal and opposite reaction. If I haven't said it all ready, Everything happens for a reason. Some call it the "Butterfly Effect." One choice affects all of the others.

                You can't describe great cosmic significance to a simple earthy event. Coincidence is all it ever is. And most moments go ignored. But we are making history here people, it's all about are you willing to take the time to observe. Every moment anyone has ever experienced, or have never experienced...happened because of a chain events leading up to that
 end result. Of course it is easy to see an example like: You never brush your teeth, and you end up with gingivitis.

Run Shaw, run, fiddle that tongue

Cast your ears down out of sight

Run Shaw, run, twiddle your thumbs

Flight Boy!, Flight!

Talk Show, talks, Eve crumbles Eden

Futures fly past after mumbling "Eaten"

Fingers taste bitter sweetness of succumbed yum

Talk Show, talks, so we have become, we have become

Do you think the reason Asians have slanted eyes is because the sun rises in the East?

I can't explain how I am feeling right now, I.. it's too complex. I feel like a string of paradoxes, tangled in loops; everything has a different meaning, but it all means the same. I just can't get away from it. I feel like I am alone in space.. don't get me wrong, it's a great view, and I can see everyone from out here, but I feel isolated. Maybe it's just me playing tricks on myself, and I'm just a fool. In hindsight I'll know that I can't complain too much. I take great pride in my personality, and I build who I am. I'm not always happy with myself, but everyone has their problems right? Fix them. Do Et! Nowz. Please? Okay, good. Thanks, bye.

What does that really mean? Why do we say it? Why not have a good rest of your life? ? ? WHY SAY HAVE A GOOD DAY? I just don't get it.. do you? You do? Shit dawg, teach me. Oh.. what's that? I ain't your dawg? Hell.. even Jesus is my dawg. He treats me right, why can't you? Boo hoo? Fool. Cap yo'self.

^--- For that I have no excuse.

I'd like to think that it is a bit more personal to say day, it lets the mind focus on a shorter increment of time rather than all of one's future. The brain can only handle so much until it becomes inefficient, this is what separates the vital from the unnecessary, and where things tend to go not the way you expected. I start over here and end over here, it just doesn't make sense. Some would call it finding ways to occupy your time waiting on a queue to pop. /shrugs. Just another day in the life of Taylor.

You are bigger than me

The feeling is just so welling

Sorry that it is so thick

It sounds like a good cover for heaven forbid whatever could happen.

Less Broadly.

White matches, people flirting, fine wicks, light conversing, tall tail, lust overriding, long rails, quit roasting, there is not another mother I'd like to fuck here, quit boasting, it's not like your father is here, quit joking, it's not good for your opening, try another friend, and see what he's choking, toaking, holding, down against his leg, his pockets bulging, trying to find another way to pass through in blaze, growing, showing no attention to those blowing it all up, screwing up his days, his dreams, his life's cream filling

His Lover's Loser

Yup that is me

You know what God is waiting for? Me to stop triple thinking everything that goes through my mind. Everything that is said is to make everything alright. Fine is never good enough, but I'll take okay. It's about growing up, blossoming into ourselves as individuals. I'm at the peak of 21, so I think.. but believe in me I am reaching for 23.

Our senses(experience) work like gears on a wheel and make you feel the way you do.

I

Is

Ish

I see

I them

I am the

I am more

I am lames

I live simple

I can change

I am surrounded

I am not the wiser

I am breaking away 

I want to share my voice, because that is where I am weak the most

I feel that if I could share that, it would change the world for the better

I know that if things are better that I will be happy, and we all want that

I assure you that if I am happy, that you are happier, some call it contagious

I need the feeling, I desire the warmth that a smile brings in my cheeks and heart

I realize that I can not live forever, but in a small window of time; it may be one where I belong

I dwell in a space in my mind, where the only thing I am not is everything all around myself

I will never be conscious of the peak of my potential, to be on that level of creativity is god-like
And only then, do I have to look down, or loose them below me; all of you, my only friends.

I won't ever have the right words to say what I mean, so why stop now?

Your jaw clinches with acceptance, your cheeks swell with red

Your eyes follow through, your lips quiver, and all is said

The letters fall into white space like former fingers hit with haste,

copy and paste

"It is a far, far better thing that I do, than I have ever done; it is a far, far better rest that I go to than I have ever known."
 

It's how you put it that makes all the difference. 

I pray for a change.("Praying instead of.." or "..wanting change")

If you mess up, it's okay, you just have to start again.

You are my demon counterpart

You were my lioness

We seek through each others eyes

You let me see down your red dress

Who I am? I ask you.

You follow through with a forget-me-not

You dance on broken wings

We stare down each others' glare

I spit out your golden ring

Who am U? I plead please.

Eleven:Two two

I am the man who keeps it tidy

Hey, because it's you (ticks tongue and hand motions 2 pistols shooting)

How is the gun treating you

Finagle

There lays an island in the desert, somewhere between something and imagination land

The long days seem to open and they all seem to end, with just another hard foot dug within the sand

And while the crushing tides decide the way of it all, the people have begun to solve the Titan's ancient riddle

After years of receding, teaching, and increasing waves of generations passed through the clouds of the Great Remembrall

As we all fall back to our childhood dolls, we find while hugging and squeezing the last drop out of the sun's signal

Dreams please ride the waves of our minds, like my heart does around these flying blind lines

And lead them both to the end peacefully, within the sea, and beside me.

Are my memories anything really, or am I just seeing through your projection completely

I'm sitting in a dream, listening to the leaves, and the pages turning my memories

Calling from the roots of the trees I see.. a vivid light ahead of me. I go into, but not too far, it does not take me completely. I am on a threshold, I am at a choice, now or never sort of gig.. what do I do? I think to myself, well I know what is behind me.. but the forward is unknown.. I think it's safe to say, here is to the rest of my new life.

----

Definitely updated.